Learn To Be Independent
There are many people who think that “being independent” means the same as having so much money in the bank that you do not have to be dependent on anyone else. Others believe that independence is achieved when one is able to make choices without asking permission from others.
Both definitions are correct, but they can also be combined into something that fits even better with what it really means to “be independent.”
Making a lot of money (or at least enough to make ends meet) is sometimes related to necessity rather than will. In addition, autonomy should extend beyond the balance of our bank accounts and wallets. If you can pay your bills, congratulations! But that’s not all you need to know to be completely independent.
In fact, autonomy is more closely linked to our ability to control our lives: knowing where to go, not waiting for others to tell you what to do, etc. Independence also has to do with a person’s abilities to to arrange things on their own, to follow their ambitions and goals, to have the ability to carry out their own tasks without asking for help, it has to do with how they envision the future, and so on.
How can I be more independent?
To become an adult with sufficient autonomy to do what you want to do and not be dependent on something or someone, you may want to start by:
- Take better care of yourself both physically and mentally as well as emotionally. If you do not respect yourself, it will be completely impossible for you to enjoy life to the fullest. That is, if your mind and body are not in good shape, there is a greater chance that you will get sick, or that you will be in a bad mood, and especially, that you will continue to be dependent on those around you.
- Be disciplined. This is really important because order and being strict with ourselves can help us to be more effective when we have to deal with different situations. You should not allow yourself to be carried away by your own emotions. Rather, be sure that pure willpower will allow you to get out of any situation.
- Believe in yourself. This is a fundamental step towards independence. If you have faith in your own abilities, talents and virtues, it will be much easier for you to continue down the path where you will realize your hopes and your dreams.
- Get yourself a “taste” for life. People who depend on others to be happy do not really know the best thing about living. The choices they make always have something to do with others rather than with themselves. Although being independent does not mean the same as being selfish, it can be a good start to start by being aware of your own feelings, and finding the “salt of life” in all situations.
- Look at the glass as half-full. One of the characteristics of all independent people must be to be optimistic. Obviously, it involves being aware that life is good even if things do not always go well, but it is also about having the ability to find joy in the small, everyday details.
In short, it is the sum of the millions of grains of sand that eventually turn into a beach. The same thing happens to us when it comes to the events and belonging of our lives.
Be more grateful for what you have, and do not waste time and energy you do not have on complaining about what you do not have.
Being independent means that, although others can come up with their opinions and help you with certain things, it is always you who is the captain of the ship called “your life”. No one is going to give you words of encouragement if you do not do it yourself. Find a way to motivate yourself that is effective for you.
Remember that in order to achieve the independence you so desperately want, it is absolutely necessary that you have faith in yourself, that you always try to improve as a human being, and that you grow and find out what it is you miss. No one will ever do anything for you.
Finally, I ask you to reflect on the words of Michel de Montaigne:
