Hidden Anger: A Feeling We Are Not Aware Of

Hidden anger, the rage we feel but keep to ourselves, has the power to change our personality. Disappointments, defeats and lost illusions as well as all the wounds and injuries we incur throughout life leave traces. What we rarely realize is that these experiences are often transformed into anger. If we do not work with these inner realities in a proper way, we will carry with them the weight of them, and the discomfort they have left behind, wherever we go.

Not all people are familiar with anger and the different ways in which it can be expressed. We often associate it with outbursts where our “evil side” appears, when we say and do things we do not really mean and which we will later regret. But the fact is that we often end up burying the mind deep inside us. Instead of expressing our rage, we decide to hide it.

This feeling also has a quantitative aspect: the longer it is allowed to build up, the greater the psychological discomfort it produces. An excess of anger that does not always translate into irritated facial expressions or that you howl and scream or have an inappropriate behavior. Instead, this feeling produces anxiety, fatigue, bad mood and in many cases severe depressive disorders .

The camouflaged feeling we forget to control

Although many may find it shocking, a person can live with hidden anger for a lifetime. The pain of being treated badly or abandoned is one of the reasons that can lead to this.

Anger is really nothing more than the coexistence of several different emotions. It leads to sadness, feelings of injustice, anxiety and fear. The fear that something from the past may return or the fear of being vulnerable again. All these feelings are part of anger. A formless and long-lasting inadequacy that is all-consuming and at the same time obscures the surroundings.

Rage, irritation, aggression, tension and loss of control. All these feelings come to our minds when we think of rage. These associations are not wrong, but the truth is that people do not always react in this way when they experience this feeling.

Dr. Thomas Denson at the University of Michigan explained in a study that we can experience anger in different ways. While some choose to express it, others decide not to say anything and instead carry their minds in secret. Having it this way over a long period of time can create a big void in an individual’s personality.

The characteristics of a person who carries a hidden anger

The experience of emotional defeat. To be deceived by a special person. Not achieving an important goal. All of these realities are examples of why some of us bury our anger deep inside ourselves.

Here are some of the characteristics of people who carry on hidden anger:

• Distrust. Eye-catching difficulty trusting the people around them.
• Sarcastic, cynical behavior and frivolous reactions.
• Persistent mood swings
• Tends to always postpone things. They find it difficult to commit and fulfill tasks.
• Irritation.
• Difficulty enjoying fun, positive moments.
• Insomnia, nightmares and a tendency to wake up in the middle of the night.

• Physical and mental exhaustion.

How can we deal with our rage?

When we read books or articles on how to deal with rage, we often see that few of them suggest a holistic approach. There are not many that touch on the subject of hidden anger or how harmful it can be. Doing relaxation exercises or looking for ways to express this feeling is simply not enough to work with this form of anger. We are not saying that these techniques have no effect, only that they do not solve the problem of the hidden mind.

Instead, we should take note of these ideas.

Vulnerability

In order to deal with the hidden mind, it is important to get to the very core of the problem. In many cases, it is precisely the feeling of vulnerability that is the very source of the problem. Fury occurs when we feel deceived, surrounded by injustice, frustrated, crushed or angry at something or someone.

Self-esteem

The next step is to work on our self-esteem and self-confidence. Sometimes it is just not possible to solve the situation that produces the hidden mind. Therefore, we must instead work with ourselves and with the goal that the mind should not be allowed to influence us. The best way to do this is to realize our own potential and our own value.

Useful thoughts

Hidden anger has great and powerful abilities when it comes to kneading our thoughts and experiences. We are always focused on what brings us pain and disappointments and constantly return to negative experiences. This approach often obscures our judgment and leads to mental exhaustion. We should rather keep our inner dialogue healthy and productive in order to move on from a painful experience.

Focus on relieving and not on nurturing your hidden anger

Rage is a feeling that nourishes our minds daily. We intensify it by being rigid. By constantly postponing tasks and by a rigid mental approach that is locked into events in our past. If we really want to repair and heal our hidden anger, we must lift the anchor that holds us fast and give ourselves the chance to move forward.

Moving forward is only possible if we set ourselves reasonable goals and work hard to reach them, if we stop being afraid to leave the comfort zone, place ourselves in new unfamiliar situations and get to know people who bring joy to our life. Sometimes it is necessary to start again, in all areas, in order to finally be able to put behind us the weight that made us unable to breathe.