Pistantrophobia: When You Are Afraid To Trust Others

Most of us have experienced disappointment or betrayal in love at some point in our lives. And we have all experienced how difficult it is to trust the one who has wronged us. In itself, trust is not an easy task, but if you also suffer from pistan trophobia, it can be almost impossible.

Trust is not free, and it’s something you either have or do not have: there is no middle ground. It grows out of months and years of shared relationships and experiences.

We know that it takes a long time to gain trust, but very short to lose it. But they also say that the last thing we lose is hope, and that time heals all wounds.

What is pistantrophobia?

Pistantrophobia is characterized by an irrational fear of building an intimate and personal relationship with others. Past traumas or harmful experiences carry so much weight that fear overcomes the desire to trust others.

People with this condition begin to feel as if everyone will sooner or later disappoint or betray them. They become extremely suspicious. They are afraid of the idea that previous damage can be repeated, and they will not let it happen.

“Why does this always happen to me?” “I will never be happy.” “I will always be alone.” These are some of the words they will play in their heads over and over again.

They want to love and trust, but feel they can not. Therefore, along with mistrust, they also feel disappointment, frustration, sadness, anger, guilt or generalized shame.

Behavior in pistan trophobia

No one wants pain, but if we lose our ability to trust others, we lose the foundation of an interpersonal relationship. The consequences for people with pistantrophobia are not limited to emotions, but also extend to other areas of their lives: work, family and romantic relationships.

Their self-suggestions make them anti-social and isolationist. Some of these behaviors are that they:

• Avoid activities that involve close interpersonal contact.
• Being withdrawn because they fear criticism. It is an exaggerated fear of being judged, rejected or betrayed.
• Do not go to events or meetings where they have to meet strangers they do not know if they want to like.
• Do not take any risks that could threaten their emotions. They are very reluctant to engage with other people. They feel fear when it comes to opening up to others. For that reason, they sometimes seem lonely, introverted, reserved, and even like “hermits.”
• Trying to avoid intimate relationships due to his fear of being disappointed again. They do not want to find a new relationship because of their panic that their trust will be misplaced again.

All of these consequences get exponentially worse the more emotionally involved the person with pistantrophobia is with the other.

Lack of self-confidence

Normally, difficulty in trusting others begins with a distrust of oneself. This mistrust affects the intuition or the sixth sense that dictates whether a person is credible or not directly.

People with pistantrophobia do not lack intuition in themselves, they just do not trust it. Although people without pistan trophobia do not always trust their intuition, they do not panic when they are insecure. Then they trust their judgment when they have nothing else to go on.

This lack of confidence in our intuition often diminishes our confidence in other skills, such as defending ourselves even if someone attacks us. Therefore, because we believe we are defenseless, we become even more distrustful. In this way, the phobia moves into a larger problem.

In this context, building relationships becomes a very difficult task. It is like trying to climb a very high mountain when we have dizziness. The fear of falling increases with each step we take, until we feel that we are no longer even moving forward.

This is why many people with pistantrophobia suddenly cut relationships. They can no longer continue to climb, deepen the relationship.

Therapy: the best step we can take

Trust does not return overnight, neither in itself nor in others. Therefore, in order to overcome pistantrophobia, it is important to get help. Psychologists can help us recover from our emotional wounds. By attacking the cause, we will probably solve the problem.

• Learning a good grieving process is important if we are to be able to trust others again. For this we must accept the pain we feel and not run from our emotions. Nor should we minimize the problem or look the other way.
• It takes time and rest. Your emotions need to be stabilized, so it’s not a good idea to start a new relationship. You are probably not ready to trust anyone again without previous trauma coming back.
• Practice in everyday situations that require trust. For example, you can delegate some things to your partner so that your trust gradually increases. Do joint activities to neutralize the disorder.

Trusting another person, in addition to being a real challenge, is also an important necessity. The trust we have in those close to us has several benefits.

Among them, it increases our happiness and self-confidence, so that we can face our problems better and with less stress. It is definitely worth the effort.